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Deprivation

by Introvert x Irrita

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1.
When they think of me I hope they think of your face That’s the only real thing that ever mattered anyway. I remember you sat and you watched As I fucking fell apart Like it couldn't be stopped so you Hardly fucking fought. I tried to claw my way out But you just watched me drown As the ocean in my head Kept dragging me down Sinking Below Let me drown in the undertow It’s a shame, such a shame Such a God damn waste I can’t remember a fucking thing like the lines of your face or the way you fucking taste. It’s a shame, it’s a shame But I guess it’s fine, The last thing I want Is you on my mind. I can’t stand another fucking day Fuck. I know I’m a failure Erase me, move on I know I’m to blame for everything that went wrong FUCK IT ALL Still alone here after all these years, Still drowning in sorrow, still coated in fear.
2.
When I first met you, You didn't know better This is my fault, I made you this monster. But that's just what I do; Kill the things that I love Use them as a crutch until they're shriveled up. Fuck. Take my fucking life and break it in two A perfect fucking picture of me and you I try to change I try to lose my place I try to destroy my past without leaving a trace But I can't alter my face Or erase my fucking name Just like I can't forget The mistakes that I made So what now? I keep asking the same fucking question What now? Every answer still devoured by depression Death is just the answer when my whole life’s been in question. (STILL HERE. STILL OBSESSED. STILL NERVOUS.) STILL A WRECK GOD DAMNIT So tell me Are you warmer by his side Than you ever were at mine? I could write a million one-liners Pointing their fingers at you But the sad sad truth, I still don't know what do to I'll do my best to move on I'll do my best to stay strong But it's too hard to stand straight When I've been broken all along I just want you to know If I could go back to the start I'd do the whole thing different And we'd never fall apart
3.
I Can't Even Recall Being At home In my Own skin It Was Long Before I let These Demons In I wake up every morning: Same scowl on my face Same demanding voice Says "you're a damn disgrace" Nagging at my mind Trying to pull me below No surprise when Everything I love has let me go. Deprived Of everything that kept me alive I'm still not sure how to carry on When you're not by side When my eyes lose color And my flesh fades to grey Don't save me, Just let me slip away Deprived. There is no happy ending Only nothing, and nothing, and nothing When I decide I want to die I will not turn back I will not look to the sky I'm a bomb about to blow But when I'm gone you'll never know Don't be scared Everyone dies Let me fall Let me rot It's too late I've given you all I've got Everyday I wish I had the guts to give my soul away And everyday I wish the Black would overwhelm my mind and stay But here I sit and wish Upon a star that does not shine And here I sit and wish Upon a star that does not shine Life is Negligible Insignificant Disgusting Valueless Suffering and torment Melancholy Ignorance Jealousy Sorrow Everything Nothing DEATH
4.
Follow me, now Into the Darkness I will show you light Led astray I am all alone Yet I continue Apathy Rots my soul and mind I push forward Disregard interesting thoughts Tongue in cheek I am discouraged Reticent voices torture me in my sleep Uncontrollable thoughts of death Trying to understand this empty feeling that rots my chest Forsaken me Only darkness fills this void I am not concerned Unconscious I am not concerned I am not concerned I am not concerned I am not concerned I am not concerned I am not concerned with Death
5.
My obsession with the end Has been destroying me Death's become a parasite That just won't let me be Gnawing, clawing at my brain it's Driving me way past insane I'm giving up, i'm giving in I try my best but never win Tired of feeling this way It gets worse day to day Misery's consuming me Held back by apathy Pushing forward Going no where fast Going nowhere fast Drenched in worn-out flesh Beaten scarred and weak Everything my future holds is wretched, dark, and bleak No will to go on I just want to die Waiting for the day that I cannot hear, feel, or see My dreams swallowed whole Hope ripped from my soul Weary from my arduous and harrowing journey Trapped inside my mind Wishing this would end This will surely be the end of my entirety Feeble, frightened, and forgotten My heart, my soul- cold and barren Sickness, throughout, mind and body Hopeless, broken- melancholy Inadequacy Is like a disease Giving up Giving in Life drains from my veins It pours and pours until I'm sane Neglected Trembling Nervous wreck On the edge All alone Nothing left Fade to black Dead and gone

about

Depressive self-loathing collides head-first with existential dread in the split EP from Michigan/Pennsylvanian duo Introvert and Pennsylvania/New Jersey downtempo act Irrita! Featuring two tracks by each and a unique collaborative effort, Deprivation will rob you of your will to live.
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Introvert:
- Facebook: www.facebook.com/introverthardcore
- Bandcamp: introverthardcore.bandcamp.com

Irrita:
- Facebook: www.facebook.com/Irritabandofficial
- Bandcamp: Irrita.bandcamp.com
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Chugcore:
Facebook: www.facebook.com/ChugcoreINT
Website: www.chugcore.net
Online Store: www.chugstore.com
Twitter: www.twitter.com/ChugcoreINT
Youtube: www.youtube.com/Chugxcore
Instagram: www.instagram.com/chugcore_promotions
Facebook Community: www.facebook.com/groups/Chugcore
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Mixed and Mastered by Eric Fletcher

Artwork by Eric Fletcher
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credits

released June 10, 2016

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Chugcore

We stayed true to Deathcore we stayed true to you. Chugcore is one of the leading heavy music promoters specializing in Deathcore, Down-Tempo, Hardcore, Beatdown, Groove and Slam. Bringing you bi-monthly compilation albums as well as exclusive releases from top artists in the industry. ... more

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